Tidbits: Be Yourself

ByCordelia


Lose the labels, be yourself

As I’m sure you’ve heard many times over, you should be yourself. I just went to one of my best friend’s college graduation. The main speaker, Mary Spio, was very inspiring. She spoke about how you should be yourself. Don’t diminish your dreams to fit someone else’s. Don’t let someone else’s negativity weigh you down or hold you back. Don’t let labels define you.

Be yourself.

Phyrra with Hairfalls from I Kick Shins
Hairfalls I purchased from I Kick Shins

If you want to have rainbow hair, you should do it. Don’t let your fears of what your friends and family would say stop you. If you’re working at a career that wouldn’t allow rainbow hair, be realistic about it and get clip-in hair or wigs. You can now get full hair extenion clip-in sets from I Kick Shins(not an affiliate link), my absolute favorite place to buy custom braids and extensions and hair falls.

Girls Being Themselves

If you want to have hair in the normal hair color spectrum, you should do that too! Embrace whatever color makes you happy! If it’s icy blonde, red, rich chocolate brown or inky black, do it! Don’t sit around and go ‘I wish I had the courage to try that.’ Instead, do it! Make it happen!

If you want to wear blue eyeshadow, or rock out with neutrals, wear what makes you happy. Don’t worry about someone else going ‘How tacky! you’d look better in browns.’ Experiment! Try new things! Makeup is all about trying new things. So if you want to color block, do it. If you want to wear a one wash color all over, do it! Or wear the rainbow! Look at people like Lauren the Queen of Blending for inspiration. At the very worst, if you hate it you can wash it off and start all over again.

I dye my hair whatever color I want because it makes me happy. I do it for myself, not someone else. I wear whatever makeup I want – bright or dark – because it makes me happy and it’s what I want. I don’t do it for someone else.

You’re in charge of you.

Every day I see someone on Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter, etc. lamenting that they don’t have the confidence to wear the clothes they want, bright makeup or dye their hair. We hear about Makeup Rules – about what people should or should not do. Well guess what! You’re in charge of what you can and can’t wear. No one else is. You are.

If you are someone who is shy, has anxiety, or lacks confidence in expressing yourself, I can tell you from my experience that having bright hair has been an advantage for me. Any time I go out, I get compliments on my hair. At conventions, people come up and talk to me. it’s a great way to help boost your self confidence. It helps you to learn to express yourself more. If you’re not confident enough to start with bright hair, try bright eyeliner to begin, then move on to bold eyeshadow. Clip-in streaks for hair also work great for this too, not only for work/school but also if you’re not ready to take the plunge and bleach and dye your hair.

Women Having Fun Being Themselves

Don’t let labels define you.

Humans like to classify things. People like labels. Labels make things easier for our minds to process. But it’s far too easy to be pigeon holed because of labels. Labels can be a good starting point, but don’t let them hold you back. Dress how you like. Wear what you want. Do what makes YOU happy. Don’t worry so much about the people next door gossiping. They’re not important. This has been a hard lesson for me to learn, but it’s true.

Be Yourself, Not a Second Rate Version of Someone Else

Be yourself, not a second rate version of someone else.

If you like this post, please tell me in the comments below or share it.

Cordelia Frost is the creative force behind Phyrra, a treasure trove for cruelty-free indie and goth makeup enthusiasts. She's the author of the game-changing 'Hooded Eyes Makeup Manual' a must-read for hooded eyes makeup.

Cordelia's world is a kaleidoscope of alternative beauty, gothic fashion, and life-enhancing tips, making every visit to Phyrra a journey into a more colorful and inspired self.

30 Comments

  1. Pingback: Sunday Random Ramblings, Vol.78 | beautifulwithbrains.com

  2. Oh, how I wish I would have come to these conclusions earlier in life. These last few years I really have been learning a lot about expressing, not suppressing, who I am. The freedom is exhilarating. The way you said it was eloquent and relatable. You do great work. 😀

  4. I love this! I have 3 daughters, ages 15, 12 and 11. The 15 yo is very artistic and creative and truly has more confidence at age 15 than most women will ever have! She currently sports purple hair. She’s also done a myriad of rainbow streaks. The only thing I don’t want her doing yet is bleaching, as that’s so damaging to her hair and I’m afraid it will all break off (and I really don’t want to be living under the same roof with her if that happens, lol). My middle child is more mainstream, but she’s the one who loves makeup and fashion and likes to experiment. She stays within the boundaries of “normal” at this point, but has a ton of fun anyhow. The 11-yo is another creative one…I dyed the lower 6″ of her platinum-blonde (natural color) hair electric blue last week, and she was rockin’ the two-tone ponytail! I love that they’re each so completely individual and true to themselves. Phyrra, you’re a great example to my girls because you, too, march to the beat of your own drummer. I show them your posts all the time to help inspire them to try new looks…I get a lot of inspiration from you too! Keep on keepin’ on, girlfriend. 🙂

    Shannon

  12. Thank you! I’m so glad you like the message.. The falls are from I Kick Shins. Her work is beautiful.

  16. This is something that everyone needs to be reminded of from time to time. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of what other’s expectations are and forget yourself. Thank you for this amazing reminder! 
    P.S. Love your hair and batman necklace. =)

  18. Great post Phyrra.  Even at my age, it’s a good reminder to me to keep marching to the beat of my own drummer instead of someone else’s.  I never have been one for going for what is traditional for my age.  I have long hair instead of short, even though ‘they’ (whoever they are) say since I’m over 40, I should have short hair.  I like bold bright colors instead of muted.  I have tattoo’s, have my ears pierced 3 times and might be planning on getting a body piercing or two.  I’m a non-traditional 47 year old and I’m proud of it.  :0)

  19. Fantastic post, Phyrra – you put it perfectly! I’m bookmarking this so I can read it when I need a boost or send it to friends when are struggling. I’d like to give you a big hug – you’re awesome!

  20. I love this post and I love that you wrote it. I’d like to send it to a few teens I know who struggle with issues like this.

  21. I loved this. I think a lot of it was stuff I knew intellectually, but I think I needed to see someone else say it; sometimes the most important things are so close to the surface that we forget them.

  22. LOVE IT! I’m almost 54 and I wear bright eyeliners a lot of the time….I love your blog!

  23. Great post, and I agree with you about doing what makes you happy, and
    not worry about the people gossiping. Still working on that one!! x

  24. I love this post! Holding back from being your true self makes for a really miserable life. It’d be such a shame for people to live their life for others. We have only one life – live it, and live it well!

  26. Thanks Courtney, this is great, I think I’ll put on my bright eyeliner and move on with the day!!!

  27. I find this post very inspiring and I really like it. I agree with your opinion, to be yourself  is the most important thing, no matter what people say!

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